Have you ever looked up on a clear day—an absolutely clear day, with no clouds in sight as far as your vision could reach—and marvelled at how delightfully blue the sky was?
I couldn’t help myself. I had to take a picture of it:
Such blueness is a rarity in the rainy Pacific Northwest. Most of the year, the sky looks a sad, bleached grey. It’s only May, but summer came early to us this year, coinciding with the end of the university year.
I know the colour of the sky is not a big deal but it’s very provoking for me…it’s weird when what you colour with a crayon in a picture is true in real life as well. It’s weird when cartoons get that close to reality.
Is life a cartoon? I used to have that conspiracy theory as a kid, tracing the outlines of my surroundings with my eye’s pen. I was really into drawing, like most kids were, so I was obsessed with making things up that didn’t exist. I believed that drawing something made it exist. So someone had to “draw” our world into existence, right? I also had this conspiracy theory that my family’s life was a TV drama, like the ones my parents watched on TV, and that somewhere someone was watching our lives like a TV show too.
I’ve been going to classes twice a week this month. It’s been a surreal, oddly-flexible few weeks contrasting with the previous year of full time working. Sitting at home in pyjamas doing my coursework almost feels like a sin. I feel that I should be outside in a dress shirt doing something, being productive, earning my bread. Instead I’m procrastinating with a bowl of ramen and laughing at a computer screen during my “lunch break.” Even reading for class feels like “over-relaxation” for some reason.
I’ve always thought I’d do more writing while I was working because I would have the evenings to myself, homework-free. I find myself writing more now that I’ve returned to class, though (okay, not this blog, but in other places). The place most conducive to creativity? Class. Ironically enough. It’s the perfect place to daydream.
Summer is a weird time. A liminal space between two academic periods. Time almost stands still. While you’re in summer, the hours of sunlight stretch, making the days longer. Then, when summer’s gone, it feels like only yesterday was June 1, and you’re steeped in depression. To quote Green Day, “Wake me up when September ends.”
Sometimes, in the summer, you feel great bouts of energy. If you usually go to school, you’re free, so you do stuff with your friends. You climb mountains. Paddle boats. Play guitar in hippie beach circles. You might even go on vacation. Or, you just sit on the porch and read until the sun lulls you to sleep. Wake up with a tan.
Summer is what you make it. I’m not sure what I want to do with mine yet…for now, it seems like I have a good degree of both motivation for classwork and eagerness-to-have-fun. What are your plans for the summer?